You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
