Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
