think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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