you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
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