I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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