Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
