She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
