i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
The air taste purple.
Randomize
