You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Randomize
