8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
organizing the empties. That sober.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
