just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
