I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
