I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
