There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
