I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
50% drunk capacity currently
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
