just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
My ATM looks so different sober.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Randomize
