i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
