She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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