I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just had sex on a roof
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
