It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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