Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Do you remember whose house we're in?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize