Non-Jews are for practice
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
