he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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