We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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