How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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