You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize