Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
