Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize