you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Success! We fucked roommates!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
