Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
