Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
