I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
pray to the hookup gods
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Randomize