it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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