i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
