these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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