i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
