we're blogging at a bar
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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