Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
