AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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