Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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