dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize