You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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