a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
