You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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