Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Acid is not a monday night drug
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
