Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Are we still banned from the library?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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