you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
