the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
