Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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