Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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